Huffing OxyClean

For those of you not into infomercials, Billy Mays died on June 28th. As you remember, Billy Mays was the infomercial guy who was always smiling and screaming and who absolutely could not believe how well this detergent got stains out. Billy's sales pitch was simple, yell loud enough and people will buy your product. For some reason, this made him lots of money. He eventually died of a swollen heart due to some self medication.

Well the blood test for Billy Mays came in and surprisingly it consisted of all my favorite drugs. Mays blood contain heavy traces of: Hydrocodone (Vicodin), Oxycodone (painkiller), Alprazolam (Xanax), Nordiazepam (Valium), Temazepam (anti-anxiety), alcohol and Benzoylecgonine (a byproduct of cocaine).

With stuff like that going through his body, it's no wonder he got so excited about laundry soap.